we have officially lost it.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize