i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
