Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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