Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Randomize
