I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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