he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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