i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
