I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
