i already hear my dad disowning me
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
