I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Is her dick bigger than yours?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
