And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize