just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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