Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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