He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
