He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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