Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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