im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I believe in your delicious
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
