Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
