I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
