Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
