Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
