She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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