I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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