the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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