its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize