I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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