I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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