let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize