the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize