at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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