Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
