So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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