dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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