so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
