My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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