Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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