i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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