I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
