Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Randomize
