I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just pee around me
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
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