Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
