i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
