Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
smell my finger.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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