How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
