the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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