i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
