I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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