Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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