I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Quick, to the slutcave!
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
