took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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